Jim Hightower

It’s now official: Goofy is in charge of the Bush regime’s Iraq occupation.

Even as violence has ramped up again in Iraq, and even as the Bushites continue to insist that their war must go on for years, the Pentagon is working to bring Disneyland to Baghdad. Well, not literally Disneyland, but a massive, Disney-like amusement park to be named the Baghdad Zoo and Entertainment Experience, featuring hotels, lagoons, rides, skateboarding, animals, and… Mickey Mouse?

The BZEE is the brainchild of Llewellyn Werner, head of a Los Angeles based private equity outfit called C3. Investors will put up $500 million to build the enterprise on a 50-acre plot adjacent to Baghdad’s heavily-fortified Green Zone. Werner himself informed the Iraqi people last month about the splendiferous playground he’s planning to bring to them. “It’s going to have a huge psychological impact,” Werner said with grandiose Western confidence.

Oh, right – an American corporation bringing American culture to Iraq’s capital to generate profit for wealthy American investors – that’s sure to win the hearts of the locals! And if they were unclear about Werner’s motives, he bluntly told them: ‘I’m a businessman. I’m not here because I think you’re nice people. I wouldn’t be doing this if I wasn’t making money." Attaboy, Llewellyn, make ‘em love you!

The Pentagon – which of course will deploy our soldiers to defend this private venture from suicide bombings and other attacks – is on-board with the BZEE. George W's “deputy undersecretary of defense for business transformation” is even promoting the nation-building aspect of Werner’s amusement park. “Half the Iraqi population is under the age of 15,” he says. “These kids really need something to do.”

This is Jim Hightower saying… Hey, Goofy, thousands of those kids are homeless, impoverished, and don’t go to school. How about working on that?